7 Signs Someone You Know Has a Sex Addiction

The emergence of sex addiction into mainstream consciousness might have some people worried about their spouse, partner, family member or close friend. With the admission to having a sex addiction by several well-known celebrities, most often after being caught cheating on their spouse, the line between an addict and a cheating spouse begins to blur. You may find yourself wondering if there are signs you should be watching for. It is important to understand that there is a difference between a person who is unfaithful and untrustworthy, and a person who is genuinely dealing with a sex addiction.

Perhaps it is not your partner you are concerned about, but rather a family member or friend or a friend’s spouse. Perhaps you’ve gotten the vague sense that something is not quite right and you don’t know enough to approach him/her with your concerns; again, are there signs that you should be watching for.

If any of the above scenarios explains the situation you find yourself in, read on. There are signs that you can watch for, tell-tale behaviors that can act as a red flag to indicate that a sex addiction is likely involved.

1. Preoccupation with Sex

A person with a sex addiction will have an unusual preoccupation with sex and their own, personal sexual fantasies. While it is healthy and normal to think about sex and maintain a healthy libido, a person who is struggling with addiction will be preoccupied with sex to the exclusion of anything else. Eventually, sexual thoughts and activities will be the most important part of their lives.

If the man or woman in your life is addicted to sex, how will you be able to notice this preoccupation? The individual may have pornographic magazines and movies lying around. You may notice during conversations that they continually seem to center conversation on sexual activity or other sexual topics. He or she may be drawn to or point out adult bookstores and cinemas, strip clubs and massage parlors. If this person is your partner, you may notice an extreme in sexual appetite – either continually asking to have sex or never wanting to have sex at all.

2. Changes in Mood

Individuals who are struggling with a sex addiction may suddenly begin to act distant and withdrawn as they become more preoccupied with their sexual activity. As the addiction progresses, the addict will be dealing with shame, guilt and the fear of being found out, leading to mental and physical withdrawal from those around them. Their work, social circles, families and normal activities will begin to suffer from lack of attention.

The addiction cycle generally begins with addicts acting withdrawn as they are preoccupied with their fantasies. This is followed by the excitement of the sexual ritual or chase, the high of acting out (acting on their fantasy), and finally the shame and guilt after the fact. To family and friends, this sex addiction cycle will look like depression and mood swings. Many times sex addicts will be tired, sick and cranky due to lack of sleep and the after effects of their time spent in their sexual behaviors.

3. Reactionary Responses

Individuals dealing with sex addiction go to great lengths to avoid being found out, and develop elaborate defenses. Should you ask a question about a story you’ve been told, or comes too close to the truth, an addict could become highly irritated and create an elaborate story, lie or just plain denial. A simple question or seemingly insignificant statement or event could bring an out-of-proportion reaction of anger from an addict.

People with a sex addiction are not open to constructive criticism, and may feel challenged or threatened by increased supervision.

4. Sexual Humor

Those with a sex addiction may use a form of sexual humor much of the time, often teasing or telling sexual jokes. People dealing with this addiction tend to sexualize most situations and find humor in them. If someone in your life is a sex addict, you may notice that he or she often points out any statements with a double entendre, a phrase that could have two meanings, one of which is sexual.

Sexual jokes can also be used to find new sexual partners. Individuals with sex addiction may watch the reaction of a person upon hearing their sexual joke and, if the reaction is favorable, they may take the level of sexual engagement up another step.

5. Inappropriate Sexual Behavior

Those with a sex addiction are not difficult to spot if you know what to look for. They are always telling sexual jokes, or touching people in a way that doesn’t feel right. They are overly affectionate and are always looking, especially at attractive people.

Sex addiction is progressive behavior that escalates the longer the disease goes on without help. As time goes by, those dealing with this addiction can be very direct, coming up to you to talk about sex or invite you home with them. As the disease progresses, the inappropriate behavior will get worse, as will the consequences of that behavior.

If your spouse is an addict, he or she will likely become increasingly frustrated with the sexual activity in your marriage/relationship. This could lead to an avoidance of sex in an attempt to tamper the frustration, or because sexual needs are being met outside of the marriage. A person with a sex addiction may make more and more demands for sex and for certain types of activity or might be suddenly not interested in sex at all.

6. Life Difficulty

As sex addiction progresses, addicts spend more and more time thinking about and trying to obtain sex. This leaves less time available for all other areas of life, including work, family, friends, sleep and other obligations. If you begin to notice that these activities are being ignored, you can be certain that the energy normally spent in these areas is being used somewhere else.

As time goes on, there may be the loss of jobs and income. Social relationships and once-important friendships may be jeopardized. If illegal behavior is involved in the individual’s sex addiction, there may be arrests and time spent in jail.

7. Direct Evidence

Eventually, as the disease progresses, you will likely be faced with some kind of direct evidence of the problem. This could come in the form of credit card bills with company names you don’t recognize, phone bills with 900 numbers, pornographic materials, evidence of infidelity, unexplained time away from home or work, late nights working, extended time on a computer with the door closed or locked and so on.

If, after reading the above, you believe that there is a person in your life who is struggling with sex addiction, there are things that can be done to help. Confronting the individual, offering help, and taking steps to not enable negative behaviors are all ways to handle sex addiction in a friend or loved one.

 

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Reach For A New Level Of Intimacy: Sex Toys For Him and Her

There are a lot of women who are a little put off about their man watching porn or using sex toys. They feel that somehow it diminishes what they have and that it means that the man needs more than just them. It may sound strange but women can actually be jealous of magazines, movies and latex.

Women feel betrayed and angry because their man will usually hide his toy use and porn consumption. What women fail to understand is that this is an area that could actually draw the two of them closer if she will only let it. This attitude is not restricted to women, there are men who go ballistic when they find a vibrator in their woman’s arsenal.

The problem is that these insecure men and women see the sex toy as a rival instead of one more way they can find enjoyment with each other. The key to being comfortable with all things sexual is being confident.

Sex toys are not something that is new, they have been in use in some form since ancient times. While most people think of them as a piece of equipment for solo use, they can be used by couples to add a new dimension to their love. It is a way to take the taboo out of bedroom play. It might amaze many that there is still a very puritanical way of thinking when it comes to sex and what is acceptable.

Sex toys come in a variety of shapes, sizes and models. While the world is more accepting all forms of stimulating devices for women like vibrators and dildos, more and more you will find that the market is opening up for men sex toys.

We are all familiar with the jokes surrounding the “blow up doll” as a female substitute, but these are no longer the only item being made for men today. There are many hand held devices that make solo sexual satisfaction better. There are times when many couples find that coitus is not practical. It is at these times that the male sex toy can be a great relief.

The real trick to enjoying adult sex toys is that you and your mate become comfortable with your sexuality. You have to be able to enjoy sex with the lights on, without shame or inhibitions. The reason a lot of men hide their porn and sex toy use is that they have grown up in a society that have made it “TABOO” to do what comes naturally.

It is this prevailing attitude and the females insecurities that make men feel a sense of shame. We are trained to believe that sex is only to be an activity between a male and female. That pleasuring ones self is depraved somehow. Although we have become a more enlightened society these ingrained notions still exist to a certain degree. Adult sex toys are seen as items used by only a subversive subset and that “normal” couples do not need to enhance their sex play.

Before now the adult sex toys were delivered in those plain brown wrappers or you had to do a “cloak and dagger” routine so that no one would see you going into “one of those shops”. The Internet has changed all of this, you can now browse the catalogs of hundreds of sex shops, from the privacy of your own home.

Using the Tips From an Adult Sex Guide Could Help Improve Your Love Life

Many books have been written for adults only. These books not only contain jokes, list out sex tips and discus different problems but also focus on games adults play. You can check out the details online and then download the right information which you can read at leisure. Several “Men’s only”sites are also available, where you can sign up as a member. Men openly discuss the most delicate topics and share views and opinions online. They send out regular newsletters, so that you receive an update on the latest in fashion, gadgets, products and more.

Some men are naturally good lovers. They are able to keep their women happy by doing what comes naturally. The important thing is that you should learn to relax. You should concentrate less on trying not to prematurely ejaculate and more on getting your lover in the right mood. A woman likes to take her time enjoying the sensations and foreplay that allows her to reach her peaks. Learn how to kiss and fondle her in such a way that she gets turned on. You can get detailed information from any adult sex guide online. Do not be hasty in choosing the first one that you see. Seeking information is one thing but putting it into practice will make the difference.

An adult sex guide will have more explicit information on the secret hot sex buttons you need to press, how much pressure you can apply and how to control yourself, from exploding prematurely. In the privacy of your bedroom, you can try out different variations and techniques. You can completely transform your den to make it look alluring, by lighting a few incensed candles, or you can both soak in that Jacuzzi swirling with beautiful red rose petals and lavender scented oils. The whole ambiance should be seductive with light music playing in the background. Do not overdo any of this because that could scare your lover away.

Make use of the hot sex tips that are contained in an Adult sex guide. Remember, kinky sex may interest your partner. Discuss your likes and dislikes and mutually try to benefit by deriving maximum pleasures from your efforts.

Missing Persons Investigations of a New Age

George Orwell’s novel Nineteen Eighty-Four was first published in 1949. You’d have thought that his vision would no longer be up-to-date 65 years later. The world he described was a world where Big Brother was watching people, constantly seeking information about crime think or any other kind of offence against the glorious super state of Oceania.

Edward Snowden showed us, that what Big Brothers these days are doing is not all that different from what Orwell described. Sure, the technology is quite different from what he had envisioned, but Orwell’s novel is not about science and technology, but about the horrible world where governments might monitor our every move, observe us in our most intimate moments and know about everything we do. Modern day supercomputers, satellites and all sorts of technology make that easily possible for various government agencies.

Yet there is so much information out there that is easily accessible without any spying satellites, supercomputers or without bugging mobile phones. It’s the information millions of users are putting online every day of their own free will, just to get some likes, re-tweets or shares. People tell themselves that they are doing this to stay in touch with each other, but they fail to realize how much of their personal information they are giving away every moment of every day.

With more than half of Australians being active on Facebook, it seems like this would be the most promising social network to start an investigation. The information found on Facebook is truly varied. There are photographs, comments as well as check-ins that give away a person’s current location. Furthermore there is a time stamp on everything, which makes it easy to create a collage of events a person went through at a certain time. No special equipment is needed for all of this with much of it capable of being performed with a simple smart phone.

Of course people tend to forget, that social media doesn’t mean just Facebook and Twitter. Apart from other household names like LinkedIn, Google+ or Pinterest, there are dozens of other smaller, niche websites that cater to all sorts of profiles. Finding information across all of these platforms can turn into a large investigation on its own.

Investigating social media is not only about snooping either. People tend to forget, that Facebook is first and foremost a platform for communication. As many people from the younger generations no longer even have a landline and choose not to publicly reveal their mobile number, Facebook and other social media may be an easy way of tracking them down for communication or to even serve court documents.

Being a private investigator and not knowing anything about social media is something that has become unimaginable in this day and age. While traditional methods such as surveillance are still very effective, they are considerably supplemented with comprehensive desktop investigation based on extensive social media profiling and as the next generation moves more of their life onto the internet the value of this brand of profiling is only going to increase.

Ecommerce – The Importance of Having a Privacy Policy

A privacy policy, also known as an information management policy, is an agreement between a website operator and a website user that determines how the operator intends to use, collect, store, share, and protect the data that the user shares through interactions with the website. Even a little more than a decade ago, some commercial websites did not have privacy policies, but now, virtually all websites have one. These policies, which should be separate from the website’s terms of use agreement, are a necessity for several different reasons.

The Policy Can Foster Transparency and Trust between Operators and Users

In connection with privacy policies, website users usually want to know two things: what information the website collects and how that information is used. Best business practices dictate that website operators let users know the answers to those two questions and let them know how to control that use.

Some websites inform users that they simply collect information for their own use, and other websites disclose that they provide that information to third parties under certain circumstances. eBay’s privacy policy, for instance, tells users that it does not “disclose your personal information to third parties for their marketing and advertising purposes” without the user’s explicit consent. The policy says eBay may share personal information to third parties when it is necessary to prevent fraud or use the eBay website’s core functions. The extended version of eBay’s reader-friendly policy could be improved by specifically informing users at what points of service the information is collected and how it is shared at each point.

A website should also update users whenever the privacy policy changes. It should let the users know when the new policy will go into effect, and it may allow users to agree to the changes, explicitly through a dialogue box or implicitly through continued use of the website.

The Policy Can Help Shield You from Legal Liability

Although there is no general federal law outlining privacy policy requirements for websites that collect information from adults, several state laws and minor-specific federal laws exist. For instance, the California Online Privacy Protection Act of 2003 (OPPA) requires that website privacy policies must contain certain information, including: “personally identifying information collected, the categories of parties with whom this personally identifying information may be shared, and the process for notifying users of material changes to the applicable privacy policy.” The Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA) requires operators to maintain a privacy policy if the website is directed to children under the age of 13 or knowingly collects information from children under the age of 13.

Read for more for additional information regarding privacy policies, terms of use agreements, internet business, and eCommerce.

Darin M. Klemchuk is an intellectual property (IP) trial lawyer located in Dallas, Texas with significant experience enforcing patent, trademark, copyright, and trade secret rights. He is a founding partner of Klemchuk LLP. He was selected to be included in the Internet Lawyer Leadership Summit, a group of lawyers in the US focused on Internet law issues. He also practices commercial litigation and business law, social media law, and ecommerce and IP licensing.